Note to self: You can't sleep without a blanket. Remember that the next time you fall asleep wearing a sweatshirt. You will wake up dying of heat exhaustion and dehydration. Protip: Keep a bottle of water next to your bed.
Rule #3940: If you really like a boy, act like a normal person. Get over your nerves and SPEAK. English is your first language, don't resort to giberish. You can use your words, SPIT IT OUT.
Warning: Whenever you feel there is any pressure, your voice goes up like seven octaves. Whether it be when you are at work, talking in class or even to a boy. You sound like a little girl again. It's a little annoying.
Note to self: Hit the tennis ball, not your knee with your tennis racket.
Note to self: You're a cute girl. But when your mascara leaves you with raccoon eyes in the morning and you forget about it, your cute factor gets turned down a few notches. Protip: Wash your face before your early morning work shifts, or at night.
Warning: Your hair doesn't dry well if you sleep on it. Unless you want to look like Alfalfa, take a shower in the morning.
FYI: Doors open 'Push' mean you have to PUSH them, not pull. There will be someone watching you as you try to open or exit said door and they will awkwardly try not to laugh at you but you will still hear their snort.
Note to self: Most artificially colored candies, desserts or foods will leave your mouth stained a certain color. Refrain from eating said items on dates.
Beware: Apparently you look younger than you are or you are attractive to minors. EFY boys will pass you and give you the "Call me" sign. Smile, keep your disgusted face to yourself and walk, or run, away.
Note to self: Cinder block walls are not your cuddle buddy. They are not forgiving when you smack your head into them in the middle of the night. They could care less if you silently curse them as you try to get comfortable again. Protip: Turn over and hug your pillow, it won't cuddle you back but at least it is soft.
Rule #2385: Don't attempt something that you can't 100% guarantee you won't screw up and make a fool of yourself, especially in front of people you barely know or that you are trying to impress.
Warning: Your razor is sharp. If you oversleep on Sundays before church, don't shave your legs. You will either take too long and be verrrry late to church, or you will try to shave too fast and cut yourself a dozen times. Your legs covered in cuts and bandages looks just as bad as a little stubble.
Note to self: Jensen, face it. You're awkward. You're a clutz. You're a hot mess sometimes. The Universe is sometimes out to get you. But that's okay. Someone will love you for all your quirks one day. Then all will be right in the world. If you're lucky, you'll get someone that is just as awkward as you. Then you can laugh at each other and compare bruises. Oh, life.
Oh, I wonder what you are all thinking....My last few weeks have been crazy so I thought I'd share some wisdom with you but also a little insight into the things that make my life so much more interesting. Pictures are from my trip home! (:
25 days til my birthday!!!!!!!! Not that I'm excited or anything....